THE ALTERNATIVE ENGLISH DICTIONARY
I - M

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idiomatic (n) Ugandan washing machine.
impale (n) small beer brewed principally for mischievous children.
impart (n) incomprehensible graffiti.
indecorous (adj) belonging to a vocal group.
induction (n) blockage in ventilation system.
intercontinental (n) person who has wet themselves all over the world.
inversion (n) poetic version of original prose.
keyword (n) oath expressed whilst drunkenly try to insert key in keyhole.
labiate (v) perform cunnilingus.
lactic (adj) free of vermin.
lipsync (n) ladies’ intimate wash basin.
lymph (v) to walk with a lisp.
malefactor (n) gene occurring only in Y chromosomes.
mandate (n) tryst.
mastiff (n) row during a church service.
metropolis (n) underground law enforcer.
mildew (n) insignificant debt.
misdirect (n) brazen young woman.
mutilate (n) a tardy dumb person.