Well, we like talking about ourselves. We are a small group of simple country folk (cue music) some of us being related in one way or another others merely having relations. Well the adults do. The six (at the last count) children, do not contribute much to the site. Give them a chance, the eldest is only seven.

You may well notice, if you look really hard, that all the gentlemen in our office wear beards but none of the ladies do; this is our official policy, which we would extend to readers if we could.

Born in a rather slimier than average part of Reading to parents who had hit hard times, Celia was determined to broaden her horizons and managed to blag her way into Berkshire College of Agriculture, where her affinity for wildlife developed into a particular passion for vegetables. It is absolutely amazing to see what she can manage with some of her vegetable produce.

Apart from her well-renowned books, she acts as consultant to a major garden nursery chain. Her own garden is world famous and she is often to be found hard at it in the potting shed.

A lifelong deep-seated fear of catching Malaria has forced Celia to adopt a rigorous routine of consuming Gin and Tonic in order to guard against such an event, which has been an utter success to date.

Celia now lives in rural Buckinghamshire with her partner, Daphne Hunter-Vestibule.

Occasional contributor and permanent troublemaker, Blatherskite holds the record in the office for the most debris in his beard.

You might be surprised what you would find if you dug deeply enough. Amongst the bacon fat and hardened egg yolk, all sorts of lost items have been recovered from this hirsute environment including lost keys, post-it notes and used condoms.

Denim Sue is sub-editor of the site and is the glue that keeps the mostly disparate members of the team together.

Her musical interest was first aroused at an early age by hearing some of her father's 78rpm records of Adge Cutler & the Wurzels and The White Heather Club Singers. However excessive drinking, clubbing and ecstacy tabs somewhat changed her tastes, including her musical ones.

She has four children and can even remember one of the fathers, or so she claims.

Editor's note: Sue would not let us have a photograph but I found this polaroid whilst accidentally rummaging around that bloody great shoulder bag she is always leaving where people are most likely to trip over it. Despite her name Sue was not wearing any denim when this picture was taken; believe me, I've seen the whole picture and she isn't; really.

Florence turned up one day with Felicity and has hung around ever since. She speaks only French (her name is pronounced Floronse) and so far nobody has been brave enough to ask her what she can do, although she does seem to be extraordinarily affectionate and insists on kissing everybody three times on entering or leaving a room.

Her only redeaming feature is that she makes excellent coffee. Well, perhaps not the only one.

Our patriarch who keeps the rest of us in order and undermines our writing by adding obscure subversive little bits here and there when we are not looking.

Renowned throughout Tooting for has sagacity and sarcasm, he has been known to frighten ladies with his intimate knowledge of female anatomy, learned, he claims, when he was in the Dragoons.

Fortunately for all, Mephisto now only works for us part-time, preferring to spend increasingly longer periods at Greene's Club for Gentlemen playing billiards and consuming large quantities of single malt.

Born of obscure parentage in beautiful Dublin — well it was beautiful until he was born — Fingers is our Irish correspondent, or would be if he'd get out of the bloody pub occasionally.

His varied interests range from collecting milk bottle tops to frightening young ladies with indecent proposals although he appears now to have devoted his life solely to republicanism and Guiness, but not necessarily in that order.

Claret afficianado Felicity O'Toole, well renowned barfly and high class Mayfair prostitute, was born in the renowned equestrian countryside of Co. Meath in the province of Leinster, on the banks of the River Boyne, her mother taken somewhat by surprise whilst out fishing.

Her idyllic childhood in rural Ireland came to an abrupt end when she attended Cheltenham Ladies' College, "Handy for the Races", where she learned to appreciate good French red wine and discovered men, "Well a man, a caretaker at the college as it happens."

On leaving the college, looking for something to do in life to accompany her wine drinking, Felicity decided on matters culinary. Eschewing the thought of actually working in a kitchen preparing food, "Darling, I couldn't possibly, think of my nails", she chose instead to eat it and write about it. However, being a young woman of entrepreneurial spirit, Felicity has not been averse to undertaking various other services, especially for rich, elderly gentlemen.

When not in town Felicity now resides in Bath, or mostly in the bath, and she lists her pastimes in life as good food, fine claret and men. She is currently researching the sexual life of the Pholcidae.

Aggie Pratt was giving out advice from since before most of us were born. She started giving out advice at Primary School in Heckmondwike, Yorkshire, where she told all the other children what to do.

Her family moved to Wakefield, where she went to the Girl's High School. When war broke out she started work as a conductress with the West Riding Road Car Company, frequently holding counselling sessions on the top deck of her 'bus.

Later in the war Aggie moved to London where she worked for the L.C.C., devoting most of her spare time helping women whose houses had been bombed, many of whom had been widowed, and generally reorganising their lives 'for their own good'.

After writing advice columns in many newspapers and periodicals she finally washed up at the interag in December 2000.

Rob Searle has been editor of the interag since its inception. Wandering vaguely through various educational establishments, far too numerous to mention here, and failing GCE (Oxford) 'O' levels in Art (twice), English (four times), French, Geography (twice) and History, he went on to wander vaguely through life, marriages and Dorset.

His appalling efforts at cricket (highest score 5 playing for a Fressingfield under-17 team and only admitting his real age when obliged to in 'The Hempsheaf'), led to him being appointed Club Secretary to a Piddletrenthide side with responsibility for the newsletter. Feeling that, on the whole, sitting in front of a computer was better than being continuously carted off to hospital with head injuries he set up the interag as a wheeze to be able to drink and work at the same time.